Apparently, another stage in my life has been reached — parents of friends, coworkers and acquaintances have been dying over the last several months at a noticeable and rapid pace.

As children most of us don’t realize what’s happening in the lives of our peers.

Huge, early milestones go by without much notice — standing, walking, talking and potty training.

As we grow, we begin to see how others around us change and grow. We see friends learn how to ride a bike, then perhaps date and later drive cars.

Somewhere along the line our parents often transition from an always there, must-have part of our lives to something we’d sometimes wish would just go away. Teenage rebellion usually means parents become so uncool that their very presence is enough to prompt disgusted looks from our pimpled faces.

In our early to mid-20s, we often see waves of friends getting married and then often having children.

Then things seem to smooth out for a few years, at least for most folks. Along the way, we start seeing our parents as what they are — humans, just like us, faulty, messed up humans.

But despite this mortal realization, we also begin to see just how precious those parents are to us. They are, irreplaceable. And parental love is one that’s difficult to fully grasp — even when showered upon you — until the roles are reversed a bit and the child becomes the parent.

Graduation from that relatively peaceful stage in life is apparently upon me.

At least half a dozen friends have lost a parent in the last few months.

With each loss, I’m amazed at how the children — fortunately all adult children now — are able to cope with the losses.

Clearly, they’re hurting on the inside, but they’re trying to hold it together publicly.

Fortunately, I’ve not joined the club. My parents are still very much alive, thank God.

Through watching and the grief of others, I’m reminded so much more clearly what’s important in life — our families.

Not a single one of those within my circle who have lost a parent suggested they wish they had spent less time with their parents — quite the opposite in fact.

Most distinctly and fondly recall the precious time they had with their loved ones.

They also remember the lessons — good and bad — that parents taught them either directly or through example.

If you’ve ever lost someone close to you and you never had a chance to say, “Thanks” — for whatever they’ve done for you — you’ll understand the sense of disappointment in that unclosed loop of love.

All too often, it seems, we all wait too late to express our feelings before it’s too late.

It’s not Mother’s Day yet and Father’s Day is more than a month away, but all of the recent losses around me prompt me to say, “Thanks Mom and Dad for everything you’ve done for me through the years.”

My hope is that Julie and I can ultimately be as a good of parents as we’ve both been blessed to have.

If you haven’t told someone who is important to you how much you love and appreciate them lately, today’s a good day to get caught up.

 

Kevin Cooper is publisher of The Natchez Democrat. He can be reached at 601-445-3539 or kevin.cooper@natchezdemocrat.com.